It’s officially one year since I first took T. Relieved and happy doesn’t even begin describing how I feel about this accomplishment. I genuinely feel like I got my life back after taking T, and I am really looking forward to the rest the years will bring me.
I never really had the extreme desire to go through HRT for the longest time. I’ve known since I was 14 that I was not cis, but I never had considered myself trans back then. I went through many different labels trying to figure myself out, but considering myself as a trans man or even simply ‘trans’ was something very recent to me. It was only 2 years ago when I used the ‘trans man’ label for myself, and only 1 year when I realized HRT would lift so much of the heavy weight that’s been clouding me for years.
Something that I found out about myself and my journey alongside being trans is that sometimes discomfort doesn’t show itself obviously. Sometimes discomfort is ingrained into you, like you just accepting that the way your body is would be the easiest for the world to understand. That it’s easier to keep things simple and live your life as ‘cis’ as possible. In a way it’s true, and I agree that it’d be so much easier, but along the way I somehow mistook this as not having dysphoria at all. It was only when I was faced with the discomfort in public events with people I cared about that I realized that there could be more out there for me, and that I can choose it for myself!
For my anniversary, I decided to write down what testosterone has changed during the course of the year. I hope that this could help someone out there. There will be sensitive details involving bottom growth, but they won’t go in extreme detail and will already have its notes hidden like the others.
Body Hair
- Noticeably hairier even when I was pretty hairy pre-T: Already had dark body hair on the tops of my arms and my legs.
- New body hair grew on the backs of my legs and around my arms. The hair already on my arms and legs got thicker and longer.
- I also noticed new little patches of hair on the top part of my hands such as on the skin between the first knuckle and second knuckle and the little triangle patch between my thumb and index finger.
- My stomach started getting fuzzy at 4 months and after a year it's pretty grown in. There was a noticeable spurt of hair growth at 9 months. There was no hair on my stomach before. The hair covers my entire stomach and is more concentrated in the middle.
- Legs are now basically entirely covered in hair, including the inner thighs, top of my thighs, and the backs of my thighs. My calves now have the exact same amount of hair on the back as the front. My leg hair also spread more downwards to my ankles and upwards to my knees.
- Ass hair is real: it grew on the soft part and leads down to the backs of my thighs. There wasn't hair on my ass before.
- My chest only started getting a little fuzzy recently at 1 year, spreading upwards from my stomach. There are sparse lone hairs on my chest as it grows in.
- At 4 months, I noticed that mustache whiskers were growing on the corners of my mouth. It has gotten a bit more darker and concentrated, but the rest of my upper lip has remained fuzzy after a year.
- Only after a year have I vaguely noticed more fuzzy peach hair on my beard area. There has only been 1 single hair that grew randomly that I plucked.
- I haven't seen a difference in head hair loss.
Voice
- Did change a lot, but managed to keep my now upper register as a daily speaking voice.
- Changes started becoming noticable after 4 months and gradually progressed from there.
- Have to fully relax to use my natural tone because I keep it as falsetto due to transitioning around parents. This means that my vocal chords are very tense and tight feeling. My natural tone is almost a whole octave lower than my closeted speaking voice.
- Yes, my parents did ask me once if I was sick when I had my periods of vocal instability due to my voice changing. When I was actually sick, my voice cannot hit the falsetto anymore, but I sounded miserable all around so it didn't really out me.
- Singing wise I am not accustomed with the changes and have become a little self-conscious about it, but I do know that the falsettos that I could vaguely hit pre-T are not possible now. I do still have a wide range due to me upkeeping my pre-T speaking tone. This is a constant effort though.
Skin
- Acne: happened! When I went through my first puberty in highschool I had frequent pimples mainly on my nose, chin and shoulders. Post-puberty I did clear up and didn't have many pimples except when I ate a lot of sugar or when my period was coming around in those same areas but mainly on my chin.
- Now on T my pimples have come back but much more differently. It does show up a lot on my chin, on my nose and on my shoulders which were the common places for me during my first puberty but now also a lot on my neck and sometimes my cheek. I've also found them randomly on my arms and stomach.
- This required me to restart my facial routine that I had in highschool and that I dropped once my acne settled down. It's been pretty effective so far. Right now at one year it's more manageable but not at all done.
Bottom Growth
- After 4 months is when I first noticed bottom growth.
- I've not experienced any dryness so far which I am thankful for.
Fat Distribution + Muscles
- My fat distribution in my body slowly changed during the course of a year. I'd say at the 8 month mark was when I actually realized that my clothes fit differently.
- My thighs were pretty wide pre-T but now after a year they're nearly the same width as my calves. My hips have also shrunk a little less than an inch.
- I went up several inches around my chest. Due to this I had to get a new binder. For reference, I was an XL in Underworks pre-T and had to go up to 2X for the same brand.
- My chest also got more fat added which meant I went up at least a cup size. I don't have an exact reference point for this, I just know they're bigger.
- My face is a little slimmer and I lost a bit of my round cheeks but not all of it.
- I've easily built up muscle mass in my shoulders and they are much more prominent.
Other
- I now have a higher than usual body temperature. I feel warm at all times. Pre-T I was already a pretty warm-blooded person but once winter hit I'd wear a sweater and a jacket combo. Now I cannot even do that. I once stood outside for 4 hours at night post-T for a gathering in -3 Celsius weather with only a long-sleeved shirt on and sweatpants and I didn't even feel cold until I got home and touched my ice cold skin. It took an hour for my skin to not be basically frozen.
- Pre-T i was also someone who sweat a lot than usual. My hands easily sweat when I'm holding things and I had to be careful with how many layers I wore indoors but after taking T it's literally become insanely worse. I sweat just from walking outside, even if it's for a minute in the cold. I also sweat while sitting in a chair which absolutely baffles me. I literally always sweat no matter what unless I have a fan directly pointed at my body. This also doesnt change even if I'm wearing less clothes. Because of this I cannot really wear tight shirts, wear colored shirts or wear layers.